6 Weeks of The Artist's Way

Six weeks ago I embarked on my Artist's Way journey…and spoiler alert it has become one of the most important things in my life.

Nearly a year ago I bought The Artist’s Way. My friend Nony was going through a similar period of transition as me while simultaneously doing The Artist’s Way and talked about how revelatory it was. The book and all its promises sat on my shelf and even accompanied me during my summer in NY, all the while unopened. I can still feel the sharp side-eye from Julia Cameron’s work every time a new book (self-help or otherwise) was added to my collection. But, you cannot rush the seasons of your life, you can try, but it won’t yield the results you’re expecting. So finally, six weeks ago, when I was in the mental space to welcome the wisdom, teachings, and sticky emotions of this program, I embarked on my Artist’s Way journey…and spoiler alert it has become one of the most important things in my life. Yes, it’s that deep.

For those of you who aren’t familiar, The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron is a 12 week program to deepen your exploration of self and help unblock your artist within. “Without The Artist’s Way there would have been no Eat, Pray, Love,” Elizabeth Gilbert asserts. Artists (of various mediums) from Alicia Keys and Olivia Rodrigo, to Bella Hadid and Martin Scorsese have all credited Cameron’s work with influencing their own creative journeys. And perhaps most notably, the culture’s current it girl, Doechii documented her 12-week-long journey on her YouTube channel in 2020. Not saying Cameron’s work is solely responsible for Doechii’s evolution, but it’s undeniable that our girl is having a MOMENT and as one of the most creatively awe-inspiring artists in the game right now, EYE am willing to try anything Doechii swears by (within reason ofc).

When contemplating my “why” for embarking on this journey I noted that I was “willing to try anything that “works” that will help me become a more creatively inspired and free writer.” And while admittedly I haven’t written anything groundbreaking over the last 6 weeks - though I have started work on a new sample - I find myself at the halfway point of this program feeling more confident, abundant, and audacious than I can remember. Julia Cameron’s work has reminded me of who TF I am. A woman….and artist with the ability to cultivate the exact life I want and deserve. It’s God’s will, and “thy will be done.”

Week one came out the gate swinging, “audacity, not talent, makes one person an artist and another a shadow artist.” Cameron asserts that everyone is an artist, but “baby artists are urged to think and act like baby doctors or lawyers,” taught to treat art and creativity as a hobby in lieu of careers deemed more serious or stable. 8-year-old Sunny wanted to be a “ballerina lawyer,” I’ve never seen it either. But I knew it was the bridge between my first love - performing - with a career that would allow financial comfort and prestigious accolades. Cameron talks about how with the subconscious urging to repress our creativity or to take ourselves seriously many artists find themselves on the periphery of creative careers - often supporting artists. Oop. I spent years project managing “the fastest growing conference for creatives of color,” on the periphery of art. I’d deemed myself a BTS girl. A left-brain girl. An artist friend of mine, would talk about how they could never date another artist, how the logic and organization of someone like me was the balance that true artists needed. I leaned into that notion too. Julia Cameron said aht aht!! Not on my watch! After diving into deep reflections of my creative champions from childhood and imaginary lives I’d live if I could lead other lives, art in various forms came up in all of them. Interior Design. Floristry. But the most prominent throughline - dance. I remembered how I felt (feel) the most confident and untouchable performing on stage. Baby Sunny was a MF star! When did she become a BTS girly?!

But Ms. Cameron wasn’t done dragging me. No ma’am. “As blocked creatives, we focus not on our responsibilities to ourselves, but on our responsibilities to others. We think such behavior makes us good people. It doesn’t.” Wack em. As the Holy trinity - Type A/Eldest Daughter/Virgo* - I wear responsibility as a badge of honor. Acts of service is my love language. Big sister/second mom is my personality type. In later chapters Cameron goes on to unpack the ways striving to be virtuous people - to be good, nice, and helpful - is actually self-destructive - even if it doesn’t appear that way. Self abandoning ourselves and our art for fear of what will happen to our friends, family, significant others if we choose to draw firm boundaries and leave our more “serious” paths and lives. Fortunately, this past year of therapy has shown me just how tired I’ve grown of being a “good person.” I want to be good to myself. The establishing of boundaries is wildly uncomfortable, the “crazymakers” (as Cameron has coined them) have been mad, completely thrown off by my “selfishness” but sacrificing myself and my art for other people’s comfort …that ain’t it. Not anymore anyway.

For years my friends have called me a master manifestor. I’m specific with my goals and desires and then pray to remain open to receiving the answered prayers when (not if) the opportunities present themselves. This process has been true for me with jobs I’ve gotten, apartments I’ve secured, and possibly my biggest flex yet, my move to NY. I decided I wanted to move to NY just after my 25th birthday. I said I’d give myself a year so I could save a specific amount of money, and then I’d go to NY and work in the events industry. I wrote it down and told a couple of close friends (I like to say it to people and the universe to help hold me accountable). Two weeks later my boss at the time told me about a job opportunity working for an events company…in NY. Within two months I’d applied, interviewed, and was offered a position at the company. My boss even helped me negotiate a relocation package that equaled the sum of money I’d wanted to have saved. I felt excited to know that everything I wanted was possible but wasn’t sure I could accept, it was too soon. I told myself I wanted a year, this wasn’t even a quarter of that time. “Answered prayers are scary,” Cameron says, “They imply responsibility.” DO! After my initial bout of panic, my 25-year-old mind did have enough wisdom and wits to realize that an opportunity laid out so neatly and specifically had to be divine. So, I took the leap, lived my best life, and continued to believe that everything I wanted was possible if I knew it to be true and spoke/prayed it into existence. “It is - the hand of God, or good, activated by our own hand when we act on behalf of our truest dreams, when we commit to our own soul.” In the midst of a career pivot and bouts of realizations that some of the milestones I’ve wanted haven’t aligned with my timing, I began to forget this. This journey so far has been the most timely reminder that “the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too.”

Because of my “master manifesting” skills - ahem, reception to the Universe’s timing and swift action to my wants and needs - I often claim that I live a life of favor. A charmed life, if you will. It helps inform my curiosity, it makes me feel secure and safe, and sometimes it makes me feel immense guilt. Do you have friends/family who seem like they’re often in turmoil or chaos? I know a lot of those people and while I realize sometimes the chaos they are reeling from is them choosing a perspective that supports that sentiment - rather than one that leads them to gleaning information and wisdom from their circumstances - it sometimes makes me hesitant to share all of the goodness in my life. It feels braggadocious, tone-deaf, and insensitive. But, “I deprive no one with my abundance.” And that goes for you too. You deprive no one with your abundance. My reflections during week five centered around recovering a sense of possibility and being open to generosity and abundance. The resolute reminder that there is an unlimited flow of abundance for everyone, should they choose to ask and receive it, felt like a weight lifted from my shoulders (again a nurturer by nature….or necessity makes it difficult for me to accept all of the goodness). Opportunities have presented themselves over the past couple of weeks - big and small, simple and scary - and my approach to them all is, “God, show me how good it can get.”

I’m halfway through the journey, and eager to see what the next six weeks will bring forth for me. I imagine everyone’s journey is different - what resonates for them, the breakthroughs or breakdowns they experience. I won’t claim that this journey thus far has led me to write an Emmy-award winning show (yet), but it has shown me where I need more firm boundaries and where I need to unlearn behaviors that lead me back to the periphery of art rather than at the center of deep exploration and curiosity of my own. All in due time. But what I know for sure is “leap and the net will appear.” I’ll leave you with my morning mantra and I hope it sparks the same audaciousness in you as it has in me, “Help me to understand my fears and continue on my path of self-actualization despite them.” Julia Cameron, you did your big one.

* s/o Anna Newton for the perfect summation